One of these websites is Credence run by Phillip Day of the UK – go to Sitemap and check out ‘Latest’ for past newsletters. We had the pleasure of attending one of Phillip’s information sessions during one of his frequent visits to Brisbane. If he ever comes to where you live, do go and hear him, you will be amazed. You can find his speaking schedule by going to his website.

One of his latest newsletter articles contains a link to a video which is a must-see for everyone. I’ve taken the following verbatim from his newsletter. Here is the link for the video. If you are having trouble with the link, here is the URL: 

http://www.3news.co.nz/Living-Proof/tabid/371/articleID/171328/Default.aspx
vitamin C
The Weekly Health Tip
LIVING PROOF
by Phillip Day 

When New Zealand dairy farmer Alan Smith contracted ‘swine flu’ and was admitted into intensive care, his condition deteriorated rapidly, he contracted leukaemia and was placed on life-support. With his lungs unable to operate, and with no hope of their patient making a recovery, it was determined by his doctors that the equipment artificially sustaining Mr Smith’s life should be switched off. 

Faced with the appalling prospect of losing a loving father and husband, the Smith family met with the doctors and requested that they give Alan high-dose intravenous vitamin C. The doctors refused, stating that there was no proof vitamin C did anything. The incredible story of what happened next should be broadcast far and wide across the planet to the execrable shame of the medical personnel concerned.

1. Show what you know

Education is all about learning the basics, but to be an effective speaker is to practice what you’ve already learned. Although you may feel that you have limitations, that doesn’t mean, you can’t learn to keep up and share what you do know.

2. Listen

Listening is just as important as asking questions. Sometimes listening to the sound of your own voice can teach you to be more confident and say things you believe in with conviction.

3. Be humble

We all make mistakes, and sometimes we tend to slur our words, stutter, and mispronounce certain words even though we know what they mean. So in a group, don’t be afraid to ask whether you are saying the right word properly and if you are unsure about it then make a joke out of it. I promise you it’ll make everyone laugh and you can get away with it as well.

4. Make Eye Contact

There’s a lot to say when it comes to directing your attention to your audience with an eye-catching gaze. It’s important that you keep your focus when talking to a large group in a meeting or a gathering.

5. Use Humour

A little bit of humour can do wonders to lift the tension, or worse boredom when making you are speaking. That way, you’ll get the attention of the majority of the crowd and they’ll feel that you’re just as approachable, and as human as they are.

6. Interact

Interaction is all about mingling with other people. You’ll get a lot of ideas, as well as learning what makes others tick.

7. Me, Myself, and I

Admit it. There are times you sing to yourself in the shower. Listening to the sound of your own voice while you practice your speech in front of a mirror can help correct the stress areas of your pitch. And while you’re at it you can spruce up as well.

8. Smile

A smile says it all, much like eye contact. There’s no point to grimace or frown in a meeting or a gathering. You can better express what you’re saying when you smile.

9. Be A Role Model

There must be at least one or two people in your life you have listened to when they’re at a public gathering or maybe at church. Sure they read their lines, but taking a mental note of how they emphasise what they say can help you once you take centre stage.

10. Prepare

Prepare and rehearse.  Perfect practice guarantees a perfect presentation and conversation. Make the best of preparation rather than just hurriedly scribbling notes. Just be comfortable with what you know since you enjoy your work.

These are just some suggestions to empower yourself when it comes to public or private speaking and it never hurts to be with people, to listen how they make conversations, to go to meetings for an enjoyable and educational way to see the diversity there is in communicating.

There is nothing that we do that doesn’t have an emotional content, mild or powerful, happy or sad and everything in between.

The following material is from an email I received from the Hypnosis Network.  It’s not just for the ladies as men use Botox too.

It turns out that Botox can actually short circuit a person’s ability to feel unhappy.  Because of the apparent validation of something called  the, “Facial Feedback Hypothesis”, the fact that Botox prevents frowning… also short circuits one’s ability to fully feel the emotions associated with it.

David Havas of the University of Wisconsin-Madison decided to study people who had received Botox treatments that paralyzed one pair of their corrugator muscles, which cause the forehead to constrict into a frown.   The idea was to see whether the treatment affected their ability to feel certain emotions.

He had 40 volunteers who were planning to be Botoxed in two weeks read statements with particular emotional charge segmented into three categories:

Angry (“the pushy telemarketer won’t let you return to your dinner”)

Sad (“you open your e-mail inbox on your birthday to find no new e-mails”),

Happy (“the water park is refreshing on the hot summer day.”).

After reading each sentence, the volunteers pushed a button to indicate they had understood it.

Then, two weeks after their Botox injections, they repeated the exercise, reading and understanding another list of emotion-producing sentences.  The volunteers pressed the “I’ve read and understood this” button just as quickly when the sentence conveyed something happy.

But when it conveyed something infuriating or unhappy… people took longer to read and understand it. The emotions simply did not compute as easily as before their sadness and anger muscles were paralyzed.

“Normally, the brain would be sending signals to the periphery to frown, and the extent of the frown would be sent back to the brain,” UW-Madison professor emeritus of psychology Arthur Glenberg (and Havas’s adviser) said in a statement.

“But here, that loop is disrupted, and the intensity of the emotion and of our ability to understand it when embodied in language is disrupted.”

The research is part of a burgeoning field called “embodied cognition,” which posits that all our cognitive processes are rooted in, and reflected in, the body.  I think this is very interesting – if you want us to follow up with more on this theory, just let me know.

I hope you will enjoy it as I did.

Your Best Friend Or Your Worst Enemy

I am your constant companion.

I am your greatest helper or your heaviest burden.

I will push your onward or drag you down to failure.

I am completely at your command.

Half of the things you do, you might just as well turn them over to me and I will be able to do them quickly and correctly.

I am easily managed, you must merely be firm with me.

Show me exactly how you want something done, and after a few lessons, I will do it automatically.

I am the servant of all great people; and alas of all failures as well.

Those who are great, I have made great.

Those who are failures, I have made failures.

I am not a machine, though I work with all the precision of a machine plus the intelligence of a human.

You may run me for profit or run me for ruin; it makes no difference to me.

Take me, train me, be firm with me and I will place the world at your feet.

Be easy with me, and I will destroy you.

WHO AM I?

I AM HABIT.

All I know is that I have at the top of the page “Follow Us”.

Now, that’s not a bad heading, is it?  So, using the analogy that we are following each other to some extent, “Follow Us” it is, BUT we also need to FIRE UP, that is, DO SOMETHING.

I must say, I have got a lot better at identifying where I am when I take notes, what the name of the course is, or what CD/DVD I am taking notes from.

As you can see, this was not always the case

1. 1.    The first note is a quote from Dr Edwin Louis Cole: “How well we leave a crisis will determine how well we cope with the next one: to move in, we first need to move out.”
   

Now, if that isn’t true!

Do you wallow in the misery, unfairness, drama of a crisis OR

Do you see what learning you were to get from the crisis?

Do you appreciate that learning?

Do you acknowledge that you will learn from it?

Do you ‘move on’ and grow as a person?

To leave a challenge behind means not taking the ‘excess baggage’ with you, baggage such as

• Negativity
• Criticism (of others and self)
• Loneliness
• Betrayal

Failing to leave the baggage means dragging it through life.

1. Next note: ‘Ignoring or dropping issues will not solve them.  It’s running away, not leaving them’.

 Can you see the difference? 

In the first part of the sentence, you are applying primitive ‘fight or flight’ behaviour.  In the second part, you are using your frontal lobe, the part of your brain that differentiates you from ‘animalistic’ behaviour; only humans have this part of the brain, our thinking and discerning, choice-making brain.

You see, you can’t run away from YOU.  Where YOU go, YOUR problems go.

Leave them, rather than get bitter.

That’s not to say, you can’t feel hurt. Sure you can, it’s not wrong to feel hurt; it’s HOW you respond that makes a difference.

REMEMBER to always follow your dream; don’t get stuck in the odd nightmare.

1. William Arthur Ward said: “Real optimism is being aware of problems but recognising solutions.”

Just like diamonds, gold and silver, we are refined by the heat and pressure of life.

In conclusion, to aspire to greatness, we need to discipline our time, activity and ourselves.

We need to be teachable.  Two of the most detrimental words in the English language are “I KNOW”. 

They are a barricade to learning, growing, evolving and transforming ourselves to our true potential.

We can always learn.  Even if we have information before

• We haven’t heard it said in the same way
• We may not have been ready for the deeper meaning/s
• Can we teach it to others to spread the gift around and show that we really get it?

We will all go up to the top of our potential, but only if we,

• Look up
• Give up (baggage)
• Fire up
• Show up

Now, I can tell you, after writing this posting, I’m ALL FIRED UP.

HOW ABOUT YOU?

Many people make New Year’s resolutions and ‘beat themselves up’ when they don’t succeed, or get ridiculed by others who say: “Yeah, yeah, like you tried last year….”

“Will Power is not a “Character” Issue

Most of us assume that a lack of will power is a personality defect, and that if we had a better constitution we would meet our resolutions (stop overeating, stop drinking too much, quit smoking, get more done, create and follow a budget, etc…)

But the research is now clear that our brains simply aren’t designed for willpower – because willpower is a limited resource.

A series of experiments has clearly demonstrated that the part of the brain responsible for self control, the prefrontal cortex, simply can’t maintain the act of self control for an extended period of time.

Baba Shiv, a marketing Professor at Stanford University, conducted a really interesting experiment that I think really drives the point home:

Cake or Salad?

Baba Shiv’s team assembled two groups. Group One was tasked with remembering a two digit number and Group Two was tasked with remembering a seven digit number (obviously a more difficult task).

Each subject was then led into another room and given the choice of having either a slice of chocolate cake or a bowl of fruit salad.

Here is the crazy part: The seven digit group members were twice as likely to eat the cake than the two digit group!!!

The extra five digits that Group Two had to remember overloaded the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for self control, making them choose the fattening cake over the healthier fruit.

Another study performed by Dr. Mark Muraven, a Professor at the University of Albany, demonstrates this effect once again.

Drinking, Driving, and Self Control

Muraven asked subjects to “not” think about a white elephant for five minutes while writing down their thoughts (this is actually pretty hard to do). A control group just did some simple math problems.

He then had the two groups do a beer taste test – but he had warned them that their next task would involve driving!

True to the theory, the white elephant group drank significantly more beer than the control group. The mental task simply ate up their capacity for self control.

The point is that – 88% of Resolutions Fail Because Self Control Takes Energy

These are simple tests, but think about it: You go through a lot more stress and multi-tasking than any of these experiments can replicate.

So are we doomed?

Well, no we aren’t.

How to Keep a Resolution…

First, if you are going to choose a resolution or a goal, just choose one!!!

Don’t try to lose weight, stop smoking, or quit biting your nails all at once.

Since inhibition takes up energy, focus on one thing at a time.

The second piece of advice has something to do with the work of Walter Mischel at Columbia University.

Mischel’s studies have shown that people who can delay gratification don’t necessarily have more will power, but instead think of better ways to get tempting thoughts out of their minds!

So, the second piece of advice is to learn how to get creative and manage your attention.

Instead of “not thinking” about the temptation – either distract yourself or think about it in another way.”

So, there you are, all this time you thought there was something wrong with your lack of self-control.  Now you know it’s not, and you know what to do.

Part 1 – The home environments you grew up in, and the friendships that have influenced you

Part 2 – The state of your finances and your work life and your attitude towards your health and fitness

Part 3 – The spiritual emphasis you live by, how education influences you life, and how geography has had an impact on who you are

This last posting deals with relationships and the Media:

8. RELATIONSHIPS

How are your relationships?

As a general rule, do you believe people are trustworthy and good?

Do you like people?

Would you call yourself a people-person?

How many real friends do you consider you have?

Do you make acquaintances/friends easily?

What would you consider yourself to be an introvert or an extrovert?

9. MEDIA

The Media whether in the form of the various TV options, the written word, or radio has monumental impact on leading society’s values evolution. Positive and negative.

How you react to the smorgasbord of Media Values will depend on your Core Values, those that make up the fundamental Values by which you would live or die.

Each of the forms of the Media cannot make you do or think anything. The choice is yours as to what you take on board and what you discard.

In conclusion, think for a moment, what your perspectives are on any of the above areas and see if you can’t determine their origin.

Where do some of your attitudes toward sensitive issues in society stem from?

Topics such as:

• sexual relationships
• euthanasia
• certain political parties
• firearms policy
• aspects within education
• certain religions
• different cultures
• government policies
• abortion
• cloning
• genetic engineering
• taxation
• global issues
• social justice
• and, the list could go on
With all this diversity, paramount is a respect for the other person’s model of the world; to appreciate where they are coming from.

We all believe that our personal beliefs are right because they belong to us, and we defend them when they are challenged.

Wars are fought over conflicting values, beliefs and attitudes.

There is a concept in the science of Neuro-Linguist Programming that says that before we make a decision, three questions will help us to achieve a positive outcome:

1. Is it safe and beneficial for me?

2. Is it safe and beneficial for the other person/s?

3. Is it safe and beneficial for the planet?

As appropriate, if the answer is “yes” to all three, then the outcome will be congruent with what is best for all.

We hope you’ve enjoyed this fast trip through how your hierarchy of values developed.

Don’t forget to leave us feedback on how you went, AND

Let us know what other topics you would like covered.

Have a SPLENDID week.

1. The home environments you grew up in

2. The friendships that have influenced you

3. The state of your finances and your work life

4. Your attitude towards your health and fitness

Values are what is important to you and are visible in the actions you take, the beliefs you hold and your attitude towards people and things.

Let’s now look at three more of the nine, Spirituality, Education and Geography.5. SPIRITUALITY

Did you grow up with formalised religion? No formalised religion? An informal form of spirituality?

What was the attitude towards religion during your formative years?

Did you make a conscious change in your spiritual persuasion?

Do you have any form of spiritual persuasion, or none?

What is your attitude towards religion now? Has it changed?

Did you grow up under a political system which disallowed religion?

Was there a “survival of the fittest” attitude in your environment?

Is your world “I “centred or are you community-minded?

Do you really care what happens globally?

6. EDUCATION

What was the attitude towards formal education in your home? Was there a gender difference?

What sort of role models did you have as you were growing up?

What is your highest achievement in formal education? Are you satisfied with that?

What have you done to self-develop?

How serious are you about life-long learning?

What are you doing to enhance your personal growth?

When you embark on a course of personal development, are you always fully committed to it? Do you not only read, but ACTION whatever the course requires? Do you complete courses?

Are you a seminar junkie?

7. GEOGRAPHY

Did you grow up in a rural area, a small, mid-sized, large city, a metropolis, a megapolis?

What was the economic situation of your larger environment?

What was housing like? Lots of room or congested?

Was the area peaceful or were you threatened by external events?

Was there cultural diversity that caused issues?

What about pollution, necessary utilities such as fresh water, sewerage, etc?

How friendly and trusting were people? Are people where you now love?

When you walk down a street in your suburb, do you lower your eyes, or smile and greet others?

Have you been answering the questions?

Have you had any epiphanies, or revelations?

Do you see a lot of one of your parents in you or other relative?

Remember, you have all the resources in you to achieve whatever you want on all levels, personal and professional.

You are in charge of developing the ideal you, happy, joyful, content, inspired.

We show you how in “Master Your Destiny: Master Your Mind And Change Your Life”.

If you can’t get around to answering the questions each week, get around to them later – it’s really important.

There is a saying: “A problem well stated is a problem half solved.” The questions are there to guide you stating effectively what an issue could be that’s responsible for sabotaging your efforts to move on.

Next week, the final 2 – Relationships and Media.

Have a SPLENDID WEEK. Don’t forget to give us your feedback.

In case you missed the posting on The Home, you can access it by going to this link: How Did I Get This Way? – Part 1.

Let’s continue with more of the environmental influences you have had in your past and, which to varying degrees continue to follow you.

2. FRIENDSHIPS

You’ve surely heard the saying, “You can tell the kind of person someone is by the friends they keep”, or “If you want to be a millionaire, mix with them”.
That is not to say that you only have friends because you can gain from them, certainly not, but it depends on how much time you spend with different groups.

Friends and peers play a huge role in forming our values and, therefore, subsequently our beliefs. These, in turn, form our attitudes.

Has your circle of friends changed over the years?

3. FINANCES / WORK

• What sort of comments did you hear at home about money as you were growing up?

• Were they scarcity comments?

• Was money not an issue?

• Was there always enough money in your home for the things you and the family needed (not wanted)?

• What sort of comments about money did you hear from your extended family?

• Did your family go on annual holidays abroad?

• When you went to work, what were your saving and spending habits like?

• What are you habits like now?

• Has your attitude towards money changed over time?

• Do you save well?

4. HEALTH AND FITNESS

• What are your eating habits like? Do you prefer healthy foods over junk food?

• Do you live by the concept: “You are what you consume”? That is, what you eat and drink.

• Do you mainly eat to nourish your brain and body or do you eat for the sake of it, because you enjoy food?

• Do you comfort eat?

• What consistent actions do you take to keep yourself fit in all aspects, cardiovascular, weights, play sport/s?

• Do you make sure you have regular breaks to do neck stretches, shoulder and body stretches when you sit hours at the computer or at your desk?

These questions will start you thinking about where some of the values you still hold on to came from, and it’ll also make you aware of those you would like to discard – those holding you back from achieving what you want.

Not all the values you held as a child are of use to you now, so you need to make room for new ones that will benefit you and bring you closer to what you really want out of life.

It is only when we are aware of what we want and conversely, what we don’t want, that we can start the journey toward change. The “friction” that is created when we decide something that is different from our current state, is the trigger for change.

There is a saying, “Awareness is 80% towards a solution.”

Next week, we’ll look at some more.

Enjoy your week, and remember you have all the resources within you to be, to have, and to do whatever you desire to master your destiny.